9th February 2020
121 views

My mind

Made by Hashir in Introductions and Leaving

Veteran
Master
3,526 posts
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Seen 31st August 2023
9th February 2020, 04:39 PM

I have a bit to say but I'm not really sure how I want to say it, but I'll give it a shot.

If you guys don't know by now, I haven't really been active since September of 2018. Stuff happened then but I guess I also grew out of the community. But I've had a lot of time to think since then. I'm 17 now, and I guess getting older has given me more perspective on life (?) Stuff I've done back then and now just makes me think: what if I died today? Would I be fine with how I left things with people? Annnnnd, probably not. So I think I'm making this post to make things up with people I may have wronged in the past. Maybe I'll get roasted for this, maybe I won't. But really I don't care. Because at the end of the day, I think I'm more secure with who I am now.

Before I get to that though; I'm guessing you clicked this post because it's another "Leaving" post. But really, I don't know what it is. I'm already inactive, so how can I leave? I guess it is stuff I'd want to say when I eventually leave permanently. Because I'll still continue to lurk (I think?) for now.

See the thing with being online is, you can't really act the same way you do in real life. I mean, I guess you can, and maybe I could too, but I dunno. I've always felt like I've had to play two-face, but that really ain't me. I like to stay true to myself, but I guess I haven't really been that in this community. But it's a bit too late to change that now, so I guess this is my way of coming clean.

The person I tried to be on the community this mentally strong person who wouldn't be fazed by anything. But really, that isn't the case, and it never is for anyone. I'm pretty emotional and sensitive; and I'm not afraid to admit that anymore. Because at the end of the day, you can change a lot of things, but not who you really are.

milan, jack, preston, whiskey, tent, alex, jdutr, abushekaus - we've remained good friends for a long time, but i'm sorry if i haven't always been a good friend. just know i always got your back

ghost, gib, als, lemons, jin - I kinda drifted away from you guys but i had a lot of good times with you guys. but lel just aint for me anymore

bp28, musclebob1, zeternal, kris - we don't talk often but you guys are some of the illest people i know and i wish we talked more

damen, chelsey, tennis - we barely talk now but i'm thankful for all your guidance over the years, wish we could talk more too tho

gamer - we didn't end off really well and I know you're busy now, but i'm sorry for hurting you and i hope we can talk again

mike - we used to be closer like 3-4 years ago and we kinda stopped, but you've been a good guy and im sorry for things ive said about you in the past that made us drift

lyss, lush, sydney, kee, isa - we used to talk a lot a loong time ago and i had some good conversations with you guys, sorry for some of the stuff i've said/done

orlock - sorry for pissing you off all the time, honestly you're a decent guy

other people i have similar sentiments for - sugar, cristal, tave, adawg, swirlie, jenna, fable, kara, frogs, perla, jesse, flame, and others i might have forgot

I'm not saying I'm going anywhere, but I just felt like I needed to let that out in case I ever do (permanently). My discord is gN hash#3233 if you wanna message me
26

+1 by Damen, iblue, Sled, jackie and 22 others
"Behind this mask there is more than just flesh. Beneath this mask there is an idea... and ideas are bulletproof." -V

princess
Master
819 posts
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Seen 28th November 2021
9th February 2020, 04:53 PM

stoppp the way im proud of you rn oml. It genuinely feels really good to know you’re proud and secure with who you are now and I really hope you continue to grow as a person and it benefits you in the best way possibleeee
4

+1 by Hashir, Brit, Frogs and sparrow
masquerade
paper faces on parade
masquerade

Banned
2,224 posts
1,576
Seen 31st August 2023
9th February 2020, 04:59 PM

Respect to you for making this. We used to speak ages ago on OldCP/Snailschat. I hope we can catch up sometime.
1

+1 by Hashir

hey
Master
679 posts
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Seen 31st August 2023
9th February 2020, 05:17 PM

I like that you made this Hashir. Very well done.
2

+1 by Hashir and Brit
hi

Emperor of OldCP
Master
1,122 posts
2,311
Seen 31st August 2023
9th February 2020, 05:19 PM

Thank you for the apology man I forgive you.
2

+1 by Hashir and Zaron

oh.
Moderator
740 posts
2,086
Seen 31st August 2023
9th February 2020, 06:26 PM

You're a good friend, Hash. We haven't really talked much since 2016 but we talked a lot in 2015.
You might not remember me and I don't mind if you've forgotten.
But you're a nice dude.
2

+1 by Frogs and Hashir
You'll never silence my voice, no, I won't go.

Izuno - Mal31 - SecurityGuy - Jenna

hot eyebrows
Master
1,101 posts
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Seen 1st June 2023
9th February 2020, 07:44 PM

WE LOVE A MAN WHO IS EMOTIONALLY AWARE OF HIMSELF AT 17! Amazing!! Its okay to be emotionally vulnerable sometimes and that’s a really hard thing especially for men to realize, which is totally okay cause it’s hard to admit those things so I’m happy you’re in a comfortable enough place in your life to admit how you feel!
5

+1 by Brit, Frogs, Alea, Hashir and 1 other
Foot

The Great
Master
1,520 posts
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Seen 31st August 2023
10th February 2020, 08:25 AM

Thanks for being my good friend for many years hashir, although we drifted I hope we can get in touch again
1

+1 by Hashir

USA
Member
394 posts
504
Seen 21st February 2022
10th February 2020, 05:57 PM

i dunno u but this is a cute post ! I thought you would like this meme!

1

+1 by Hashir
spoke,val,sid,candy

Member
16 posts
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Seen 24th March 2021
11th February 2020, 12:28 AM

I always thought of you as a great friend. Thank you for this, it really meant a lot. Miss you.
2

+1 by lush and Hashir

Master
170 posts
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Seen 25th July 2022
11th February 2020, 06:28 AM

aw thank u hashir don’t be sorry, i’ve always considered you a great friend of mine and i miss talking to you a lot. i hope we can talk more and i hope you’re doing well

my disc is lush#5915 if you ever wanna talk
6

+1 by Frogs, Cristal, Alea, sparrow and 2 others

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